My Anguish
by ShurikenC
Summary: "I thought everything was perfect. I thought you felt the same way about me. But I guess I was wrong. Yeah...Happy Anniversary to you too bastard." SasuNaru.


**A/N: **Uhmm...yeah. Sooooo...(clears throat) Hello fellow readers! I am back from my year hiatus. Well. If I would even call it that. I've actually been checking on/off on the site for a while but I haven't had the inspiration to type. Yeah. I'm freaking lazy. No like seriously. And I apologize for that. Even I hate authors who don't update for a looooooong time. So I decided to put this story up (Its been sitting on my computer forever) until I go back through **Supreme Redemption**. It will be finished. Trust me on that! It should be done in about four chapters. I want to rewrite the last chapter so be on the lookout for it ^_^ Until then. Please enjoy this until further do! (why am I starting another story without finishing the other...Me dont know)

**Warning**: A squeeze of lime just for you guys. And angst! Major Angst for this chapter and the others. You have been warned.

**Disclaimer**: *sighs* I do not own Naruto

* * *

Naruto cursed for the fifth time in a span of only five minutes. He was almost done! Thank god he was almost done! Even if it only took him three and half hours he had finally prepared a pot full of tomato soup that was passed down from a recipe from his lover's mother. A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips. Mikoto was a beautiful woman who had the sweetest heart. She was the only one who truly welcomed him into the great Uchiha family with open arms. Fugaku Uchiha and Itachi Uchiha were not so nice. When the head of Uchiha enterprises heard about him and Sasuke's courtship he was –how do you say it- pissed the fuck off! Apparently Sasuke was supposed to marry a successful woman who was intelligent, sophisticated, and most importantly rich. Not to mention she had to be well-known so the Uchiha family could become richer than they already were. Itachi felt the same way but was a little merciful when it came to his baby brother. _That_ and he didn't want take over the business but instead he wanted to have a career in music. His dream wouldn't happen if Sasuke were to run off with just about anybody.

So Sasuke decided to keep their relationship underwraps for now until he got further up in the company. That way, he would be able to make his own decisions when the time came. Yeah. Even though he was turning twenty in a few months, his father still had a leash wrapped around his neck. But Naruto was okay with that. He never liked having his private matters out in the open. He was content to share an apartment with the love of his life without having all-knowing eyes pry into it.

They were both happy just being together. Sasuke told him so many times already. Although the bastard would be quick to deny it a moment later. Today was a special day and everything had to be perfect!

Something smelt weird. Almost like it was burning. Naruto sniffed for a couple of minutes until his nose finally found the culprit.

"You have got to be shitting me!" He exclaimed as he shut off the burner to the stove and moved the pan to another area.

Naruto rubbed at the bridge of his nose in frustration. Well, Sasuke wasn't due back home for another two hours so he knew he could cook up another batch real quick.

Looking around the apartment one final time, anxious blue eyes scanned each and every crevice of the space. Kitchen clean.

Check.

Dining table set up with a steaming pot of tomato soup and a bottle of Sasuke's favorite wine.

Check.

Candles lit around the living room making the room smell of lavender.

Check.

A freshly showered, shaven, and _clean_ Naruto.

Check.

Now all that was missing was an hour late bastard-

The familiar jiggling of keys had Naruto spinning on his heels and facing the front door. His breath caught in his throat as his blue eyes fell on Sasuke. Even though he looked tired he was still as beautiful as he always was.

Sasuke walked further into the apartment and immediately deposited his brief case and jacket on the coat rack beside the door. He gave a tired sigh as he tugged at the collar of his shirt, trying to get the buttons undone.

With a roll of his eyes, Naruto stepped toward him to help him out. "If you continue to yank at it you'll only rip it you bastard." Swiftly and efficiently, he was able to get the clasps undone but he still kept his fingers near Sasuke's neck. From years of experiences he found out that his neck was a weak spot. With just one graze over that spot the Uchiha was like a pile of putty in his hands.

But something was weird. He didn't respond back to it at all. Actually, he didn't respond to Naruto at all. He didn't greet him with a steamy kiss like he always did when he got home from work or…acknowledge him at all.

"Sasuke?" He asked hesitantly, letting his hands all back to his sides. "What's the matter?"

It was only then did those dark eyes looked back into his. But they were weird as well. They were so distant and flat.

"Sasuke?" He called out again.

Sasuke shied away when Naruto reached for him again. He simply stated. "I'm hungry." As he walked into the kitchen.

Breathing in deeply to hide the tinge of pain that flew through his heart Naruto quickly followed behind him.

"Well I-I cooked you something." He started, blue eyes watching as Sasuke darted around the kitchen, opening cabinets to find something to eat. "It-It's not ramen if you think. I actually made something edible. Tomato soup. Your mother gave me the recipe."

Sasuke stopped dead in his tracks, hands holding onto the handle of the fridge. "My mother?" He asked, as he turned around and finally put his attention on Naruto.

Naruto looked towards the ground, not liking how Sasuke was looking at him. He was glaring at him.

Fiddling with the bottom of his dress shirt –yes he dressed up! - Naruto gathered his courage and lifted his head, but only a little to peak through his bangs. "Y-yeah sh-she told me that it was your favorite and since today is sp-special I thought that it was only right to cook it for you. It probably doesn't taste good though. You know I can't cook as well as you. The only thing I know how to cook is ramen and even you say it taste horri-"

"You're rambling dobe."

Naruto looked up, cobalt eyes widening. There it was. That insult that he hated but somehow loved so much right now.

A blush stole across his cheeks. "Bastard." He muttered back, but not in an insulting tone. "Well it's on the table. It still should be hot. I also put out the wine you like so mu-"

"Get rid of it."

"What?" Naruto whispered, the pain coming back.

"Not to be mean when I say this but I won't eat it. No, I refuse to eat it. That recipe is for me and my mother only. Understand? Just throw it out or give it to one of our neighbors. I'm pretty sure they'll enjoy it more than I will."

His eyes started to burn and that familiar lump in the back of his throat was starting to form. Quickly pushing it back down, he lifted his head and gave Sasuke a small yet sad smile.

"Yeah. It was silly of me to do that. I'll just put it away. Maybe you'll change your mind later on this week and you'll eat it."

"I doubt it."

"Right." He said, his voice cracking just a little.

Turning to one of the cupboards, Naruto reached up to the top shelf to grab a plastic container but in the process of getting one down, all of them came crashing down as well. Cursing to himself, Naruto went down to his knees to clean up his mess.

"What the hell are you wearing?" He heard Sasuke ask. The raven was still standing beside the fridge, arms crossed over his chest.

"Well I just thought I should wear it since today is…well…you know…special."

"Hn. Well even if it was special you shouldn't wear things like that. It doesn't suit you at all." Naruto's fingers began to tremble. "I'm used to you wearing less expensive things."

"Well I'm sorry you don't like it Sasuke." Naruto said through clenched teeth, standing up and glaring hatefully at him.

"Hn." Obsidian eyes rolled in annoyance. Sasuke strutted out of the kitchen and into the living room. It was only a moment later when Naruto heard the television turn on.

* * *

"Okay Naruto. Everything will be alright. He probably just had a bad day at the office or something. The bastard always acts like that. He's always stubborn and doesn't like change that's all. He wouldn't intentionally hurt you…right?"

Shaking off the negative thoughts, Naruto adjusted the collar of the shirt and popped the first three buttons at that top. He wasn't wearing what he was earlier. He shed away his clothes –which were fucking expensive mind you- and decided to wear one of Sasuke's tops. It was one of his work shirts. A simple white button down shirt. It fit Sasuke perfectly but it was a little big on his small frame. The sleeves reached a little over his fingertips and the shirt stopped just short of his rear. You couldn't see it but if you looked hard enough you could see _other_ things as well. The Uchiha symbol was perched on the upper back of the shirt signaling its importance. It was always a fantasy of Sasuke's for the blonde to dress up in his clothing. Naruto would always refuse to do it because it made him feel like a girl. But maybe this was what he needed to rescue the day since everything else was a total failure. Being seductive always was a big turn on…wasn't it?

Breathing deeply one last time to calm his nerves, Naruto walked out of the master bedroom, down the dimly lit hall, and into the living room where the raven was still seated on the couch. He was watching football which was weird since the bastard was never interested in those kinds of things. Looking around the room he saw that all the candles that he lit were blown out. It didn't seem so romantic anymore. Did Sasuke do that on purpose? Breathing deeply one last time, then blowing it out a second later, Naruto made his way into the living room.

"Sasuke?" Naruto called out, catching the raven's attention. "Do you mind if I join you?"

The raven stared at him from what seemed like an eternity then slowly turned back towards the television, his long fingers still holding the television remote. He switched it over to the news channel. "Do what you want."

Nodding slightly to himself, the blonde walked over to the love seat and sat right to Sasuke but the raven moved over more to his side of the couch so that there thighs wouldn't touch. Frowning slightly, Naruto moved over as well to give him some more space.

"_In further news, the stock market has increased greatly over the past three weeks because….."_

While Sasuke had his undying attention focused on the screen Naruto couldn't help but focus on him. He didn't look. He didn't either look or care about what Naruto was wearing. Was it the bad thing to do? Well if he didn't see him then Naruto would just have to go about letting him!

Gracefully as he could, Naruto slid off the couch and placed himself in front of Sasuke's knees. Ever so slowly, dark eyes looked downward and gazed upon the color blue.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke asked in a monotone voice.

Biting his lips a little, Naruto placed his palms on Sasuke's knees. "Giving you a present." He stated huskily while he pulled apart his knees and slid himself further up.

Sasuke gave him a blank stare but didn't force him away either. Taking that as a good sign, tanned fingers reached up and unclasped Sasuke's belt buckle and opened his slacks. He couldn't help the small smile that formed on his face once he gazed upon the sudden bulge in front of him. Maybe this was the reason as to why the raven was so cranky? He must be sexually frustrated. The only thing the two of them ever did was give each other hand jobs since Naruto was never ready for anything else. But this time he would give everything he could to Sasuke.

Ever so slowly, his nimble fingers dragged down the silk boxers and grabbed at the hardness that was once encased in them.

Sauske had such a beautiful cock. It was pale just like his skin and was at the perfect size. It wasn't too small but not overly big either. It put the blonde at ease knowing that whenever it was going to be inside of him it wouldn't hurt as much. Plus he knew that his lover would be gentle when that time came. He told him millions of times.

Naruto slowly began to stroke the hardness in his hands while he kept a steady gaze upon the Uchiha's face. Sasuke relaxed his body further back in the couch and put his hands against his hips.

Choosing not to tease even further, Naruto leaned further up on his knees and slowly wrapped his lips around the head of Sasuke's arousal. Sauske instantly groaned as he threw his head back to the back of the couch. Naruto himself started to harden.

Smiling inwardly, Naruto swirled his tongue around the head of his cock then used his tongue to press against the slit. Naruto groaned himself once he tasted the pre-come that was coming out of the slit. It wasn't a very favorable taste but it came from Sasuke and that was what only mattered to him.

Breathing in through his nose, Naruto descended further down. He carefully made sure to not to use his teeth so he wouldn't scrape any part of Sasuke. Once he was able to take as much as he could, which was almost half, the blonde begin to do a bobbing motion with his mouth. This resulted in a loud hiss from Sasuke followed by his fingers digging into his hair.

Naruto forced himself to relax. Sasuke would never force him knowing that this was his first time. He knew it. Pushing aside his fears, the blonde continued to use his mouth as well as his hands to pleasure Sasuke. But it was only a few moments later once those fingers that were digging into his scalp tore his mouth away.

Breathing heavily, Naruto frowned and looked deeply into the ravens eyes. "Sasuke?"

Instead of answering him, Sasuke scooted further up to the edge of the couch. He was still breathing heavily as he gazed back at Naruto.

"Shut up dobe." Sasuke tugged at Naruto's head and once again placed his face towards his crotch. Knowing instantly what Sasuke wanted, Naruto opened his mouth and willingly let it be taken once again.

He wouldn't say he didn't like the way Sasuke was thrusting his cock hard into his mouth, he had a good gag reflex, but it almost seemed like the raven wasn't caring about what he was doing. Instead of checking to see if he was hurting the blonde, he continued to thrust his hips into the waiting mouth in front of him.

With each passing second that happened, Sasuke's pants were getting quicker. It wasn't soon after when Naruto felt a gush of semen fly into his throat. Sasuke held his face still until the shudders receded.

While Sasuke slouched back against the couch in bliss, Naruto took that time to swallow what was in his mouth and then take deep breaths to bring air into his lungs. His lips felt swollen but that was the least bit of his worries.

After he was able to calm down, Naruto looked back up and gazed up Sasuke's face. He looked peaceful. The way his dark eyes were half-lidded and his lips were partly open. There was a slight bead of sweat resting against the top of his brow.

Licking his lips, Naruto stood up and placed the palms of his hands beside his lovers' hips. Without even thinking, he leaned down wanting a kiss but a hand stopped him just inches away.

"I didn't give you permission to wear my clothes. Take it off before you wrinkle it. It's worth more than your life." Sasuke's once closed eyes were now open and glaring hard at his face. "And did you really think I would kiss you after you did that? That's disgusting."

Azure eyes widened from the words spoken but soon they closed in understanding.

Once the pale hand was taken away Naruto stood back up. With one last look at Sasuke, Naruto turned back around and made his way to the bedroom once again.

* * *

Naruto couldn't help the sudden onslaught of tears that cascaded down his cheeks as he sat at the end of their king-sized bed. His once perfect morning was now turning into the worst possible day of his life. Well, right next to the death of his parents when he was ten, but that was besides the point! He sniffed, wiped, and closed his eyes tightly to pull himself together. Crying wasn't going to get him anywhere. Crying was only for those who were weak. His father always told him that the older you got the more strong-willed you had to be. But it hurt. His heart hurt so badly. Why was Sasuke so cold to him? Of course he was already a bastard but the way he was acting tonight just made secured him the rightful spot of the King of All Bastards!

Did he forget what tonight was? Did he not care what night it was? Did he not care about Naruto? The blonde wiped over his puffy eyes. No. Of course Sasuke cared about him. All couples had their day where their relationships were at its worse so there was nothing to worry about. Tomorrow was going to be another day and it was going to okay. But why did today have to be one of those days?

The sound of the bedroom door opening snapped him out of his thoughts. Sasuke stood at the door staring at Naruto with another blank expression. It made Naruto uncomfortable…once again.

After wiping over his eyes one final time, the blonde stood up. He fixed his sleep shirt and adjusted his sleep pants then put his attention back at the raven.

"You must be tired." Naruto said as he trudged towards the door. "I'll just go sit in the living room so you can rest."

He tried to squeeze by him but his arm was quickly grabbed stopping him in his tracks. Frowning a little, Naruto looked up. "What is it?"

His mouth was suddenly filled with a persistent tongue and a warm body around him. Azure eyes widened as he was kissed deeply. Sasuke grabbed at Naruto's waist and forced him to a take two steps until his body was melded tightly against him. A gasp escaped pink lips once the familiar feeling of a certain body part was pressed against his stomach. Reaching up with his own hands, Naruto grabbed at the soft strands of Sasuke's hair and pressed his face closer to his. See. He knew it. He knew that Sasuke still cared about him!

Once the need to breathe came, Sasuke yanked his lips away but kept his forehead pressed the blondes. Mirroring Naruto's movements, he placed his hands on blonde tresses and stroked it gently. The tears came back to blue eyes.

"Naruto." Sasuke whispered, his lips ghosting over the blondes. "Not enough." He slowly thrusted his hips up.

Licking his lips, Naruto nodded understanding what Sasuke wanted.

His mouth was soon being ravished by the raven again. He tried his best to keep up with Sasuke's rough treatment but soon he gave up and let Sasuke dominate the kiss. A strong palm was placed on his chest making him tumble back on the bed. He didn't care. Sasuke was never the patient one. Instead of removing the blondes clothes, Sasuke simply hiked down Naruto's pajama pants up to his knees and pushed his shirt up so only his upper chest was visible. Once Naruto's lower body was bent so that his legs were in the air, Sasuke placed his lips at his neck and sucked vigorously.

He didn't care that Sasuke was being rough with him. Sasuke was taking care of him. Sasuke cared about him. Sasuke wouldn't hurt him.

Before he even knew it two fingers were jammed into his entrance. His eyes widened in shock.

Wait a minute...

"Sasuke." Naruto winced, grabbing at the ravens strong biceps that were above him. "Sasuke wait."

A pale hand shot forward and trapped his hands high above his head on the mattress.

Okay. This was starting to get a little scary….

"S-sauke. I bought lube earlier just in case we n-needed it."

The kisses from Naruto's neck seized once Sasuke leaned up, his dark eyes gazing deep into blue. "Hn. Who said I was going to use it?"

Blue eyes widened. "B-but it's going to hurt more without it."

Those same eyes narrowed dangerously. "How would you know? Have you been sleeping with someone else?"

"W-what!" Curse the tears for coming back. "I've only been with you. Why would you even thi-ngh!" The fingers were pushed harder in him. "Sasuke. That hurts." Naruto whispered, not meaning the fingers that were currently in his rear.

The ministrations on his neck seized.

After removing his fingers out of Naruto, Sasuke leaned with his hands on both sides of the blondes head. "Where is it?" He spoke through a sigh.

Big blue eyes blinked. "Where is what?"

"The lube dobe!"

Flinching a little, Naruto reached out with his right hand and pointed towards the nightstand table.

Sasuke quickly got off of the bed and grabbed at the small tube that was sitting in the top drawer. After climbing back on the king-sized bed, Sasuke hovered back over Naruto. The sound of a cap opening vibrated through the room. Breathing deeply, Naruto waited for those fingers to return back to him but unlike before they were being gentle this time. Only one was entered at first, slowly moving in and out of his entrance, his other fingers massaging the outer area of his hole.

Naruto sighed in relief. It didn't hurt like before. Maybe Sasuke was just so into it that he forgot to get to the lube. Yeah! That was it!

The kisses returned to his neck and followed close by with another finger. At that moment Naruto was panting lightly, a soft sheen of sweat making its way over his body. He felt like his whole body was on fire.

"I can't wait any longer." Sasuke whispered against his blushing ear. Slight pants were seeping out his mouth.

A blunt object was suddenly pressed against his entrance. Naruto's breath hitched for only a second. Okay. He was ready for this. He read many articles and even looked on the internet on how to relax his muscles so it wouldn't hurt that much. All he had to do was remember the techniques and hope that Sasuke would go slow. But he already knew that he would. Sasuke would never….

With a sharp thrust of his hips, Sasuke was quickly buried to the hilt inside of the blonde. He let out a quiet sigh and started to move his hips in and out slow motion.

Naruto's back arched off the bed in hopes to release some of the pain. It didn't help. Sasuke's thrusts were starting to get faster and harder. He whimpered quietly to himself so Sasuke couldn't hear. He was not going to ruin this for Sasuke. This was the last thing that was going to forever bond him to Sasuke. _Even if it hurt him. Even if he wasn't finding any pleasure in it at all._ This was for Sasuke. Maybe this was what Sasuke needed for his bad mood to go away.

_After this everything would go back to normal._

A sharp thrust had him clinging onto Sasuke's arms again but they were quickly pulled away and held in the same vice grip from earlier, up above his head.

_Yeah. Everything would be back to normal after this. He knew it._

The thrust wouldn't stop so Naruto turned his face to the side to hide the tears that were falling from his eyes. He couldn't let Sasuke see him in such a weak state.

_He loved Sasuke. And he knew Sasuke loved him too._

With a sudden slam of his hips and curse from said Uchiha he quickly emptied himself inside the cavern that he was in. His hips continued to move in a lazy rhythm as his sudden orgasm seeped out of him. After his body stopped shaking Sasuke slowly pulled out and stumbled away from the bed, his pants still unbuttoned and erection still out. He turned around and put his back toward Naruto.

Naruto lay panting on the bed with his body slack against the sweat stained blankets. His lower back was numb but he ignored the pain and sat up, his legs spread open. His sleep pants were still bunched around his knees and his shirt around his upper chest.

It was quiet in the room. Naruto didn't know what to say. Or rather he didn't want to say anything. He wanted Sasuke to look at him lovingly and give him one of those rare smiles that only he saw. He wanted…he wanted Sasuke to hold him and tell him that he loved him.

"I'm leaving."

Azure eyes widened. "W-what do you m-mean you're leaving? Oh! You m-mean you're going to wash up right?" Naruto stammered out and slowly slid off the bed, pulling his pants up in the process. He ignored the wetness that started to slide down his thigh. "O-Okay. I'll just change the sheets so we can go to sle-"

With a growl Sasuke quickly turned around and glared at him. "I'm getting married tomorrow Naruto."

Those tears came back. "Married? Are you asking me to marry you?"

"Of course not." Sasuke snarled as he looked down at Naruto. "I'm marrying Sakura tomorrow. You remember her right?"

Those tears fell. Oh yeah. He remembered her alright. Sakura Haruno. Head doctor at Konoha Leaf Hospital. They had met plently of times during their relationship. But of course she knew nothing of his and Sasuke's life. She just thought that they were really good friends since that's how Sasuke introduced them. The lump in the back of his throat came back in full force. He was not going to believe what was being told to him. Breathing deeply, he gave a shaky smile. "You're getting pressured into it aren't you? Your father never liked me so it would only be fitting that he would do something like-"

"You're wrong." Sasuke said as he buttoned his pants back up. "Yes. My father hates you but it was my decision to marry her."

Pink lips trembled. "But what about me Sasuke?" He took a tentative step towards him, but Sasuke easily stepped back.

"What about you dobe? You're usually smarter than this."

"What are you talking about?"

"I've been with Sakura for the past four years. You were just something on the side. To past the time that's all."

"Sasuke please…"

"I was just going to break it off with you easy but you finally gave me what I wanted so I see no use in being with you anymore. You're just unwanted baggage in my life."

Sasuke stared at the blonde with a smirk on his face, waiting for some kind of response but it never came. Not wanting to wait any longer, he grabbed at his discarded shirt and put it on. As he was about to walk out the room a gentle hand caught him by his bicep. Sasuke turned his head slightly and gazed upon bloodshot blue eyes.

"Its me isn't it? I'll change. I swear I will. Is that the real reason why you're leaving me?" Naruto whispered through hitched breaths. "I'll do anything you want me to do. I'll-I'll g-get a second job so I can help pay more bills. You know I turn eighteen next week so I should be able to get a better one that pays more. If you want me to quit school I will. That way we can spend more time together. Anything you want Sasuke. Just tell me and I'll do it in a heartbeat. Just plea-please don't leave me. You know I can't take another person leaving out of my life." Blonde brows scrunched together tightly just from thinking about the loss of his parents and then losing his godfather just a year after. He had it pretty hard at just a young age. But he got through it. Actually, Sasuke was the main one who got his mindset on track.

Naruto never wanted to get close to people. But it was only in fear because as soon as someone was to come into his life they were instantly ripped away from him. But Sasuke was different. Even though Naruto pushed him away at times, Sasuke somehow found his way back into his personal bubble. Sasuke was the one who tore the walls down in his heart.

Naruto was snapped out of his thoughts once Sasuke roughly yanked his arm away. "You're pathetic Naruto." He spoke darkly. "I already told you it's over but yet you still beg for me to stay. Are you that helpless that you need someone to take care of you for the rest of your life? Grow up."

He started to walk again but stopped when Naruto called out to him again.

"I don't understand where all this is coming from." Naruto whispered out, a small but sad smile on his face. "Is this one of your jokes? Because if it is it isn't funny."

"Hn. Believe what you want. I'm getting married tomorrow whether you like it or not. I'm so over this childish situation and I'm done with you. Goodbye Naruto."

Sasuke was grabbed yet again. "What am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to go?"

Sasuke spoke with his back still turned to the blonde. "I could care less where you go. You can stay here until the lease his finished but after that you'll have to fend for yourself. That is…if you can."

He stepped out the room but not before calling out. "Oh Naruto!" Said blonde looked up with tearful eyes. "Thanks for the blow job. You're a real natural." With one final smirk, he completely stepped out of the room and closed the door behind him.

Naruto stayed rooted to the same spot even after the front door closed. He stood for two more hours before his legs gave out and he tumbled to the floor. He tried to hold in the sobs that threatened to escape out his mouth but they broke free.

Was he really just something on the side for Sasuke?

From the very beginning was nothing true about their relationship?

What did he do? Everything was perfect this morning. Heck even the day before that!

What the hell just happened?

* * *

Alright! Tell me what you think guys! Or just yell at me for not updating for a long time (nervous laugh) It may seem a little vague now but don't worry. It'll pick up within the next two chapters. Sasuke is such an ass! Me will look back through for any mistakes that I missed.

Review please and thank you! \(-.-)/


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